ANNOUNCER: The Daily Shower is pleased to welcome Mr. David Gest!
MARC: What better person to have as our first guest than a Gest?
DAVID: What is this?
MARC: Be careful around the water with that microphone.
DAVID: I don’t understand what this is all about--
MARC: Water and electricty don't mix.
DAVID: No, I mean, why am I in the shower with you--
MARC: Most people know you as Liza’s husband--
DAVID: EX-husband.
MARC: Don't throw me off. Most people know you as “Liza’s husband” but what many people don’t know is that you’ve had quite a successful career as a producer. Tell us about that.
DAVID: OK, well, I did the Michael Jackson 30th Anniversary Celebration on CBS a few years ago.
MARC: You look like a Jack of all Trades, a Handy Man. Maybe you can answer this. One of our loyal readers, Diana Howich, submitted this question: “My question concerns the dilemma of someone flushing a toilet or using a sink when you’re in the shower and the water going red hot on you. Do you know why this occurs?”
(DAVID is momentarily vexed then snaps his fingers.)
DAVID: The problem that causes temperature fluctuations is basic. When a toilet is flushed, cold water flows into the tank to refill it, causing the water pressure in the cold-water pipes to dip. If this happens, less cold water may reach the shower valve, changing the shower's comfortable hot/cold mix to hot only.
MARC: Can it be fixed?
DAVID: A pressure-balance valve can be installed to compensate for changes in water pressure. Most reduce water flow to a trickle if the cold water supply fails.
MARC: Let’s get back to your TV producing--
DAVID: Marc, may I continue? If your water temperature fluctuates widely, you're living with a serious hazard. The Consumer Product Safety Commission estimates that 200,000 bathroom injuries occur each year, frequently the result of hot-water scalding. And, because children have thinner skin than adults, they are especially vulnerable to scald burns from overly-hot shower water.
MARC: That's odd. You wouldn't think children would be so thin skinned. They don't know what adults are talking about half the time anyway. You could call a kid a prick and he wouldn't be the wiser. But I think we should get back to your career as a--
DAVID: Marc, this is important. About 5,000 kids 14 and under are scalded in the shower each year. It takes just 3 seconds for a child to sustain a third degree burn from water at 140 degrees Fahrenheit. So all I’m saying is please be careful.
MARC: OK. The message is: Be careful.
DAVID: Can I lather you up now?
MARC: Please don’t.
(DAVID picks up a bar of soap and steps towards Marc. Marc backs away with his hands in front of him.)
DAVID: Just one lap around.
MARC: Don’t come any closer.
DAVID (singing): "Raindrops keep falling on my head..."
MARC: STOP!!! NO!!!!!! HELP!!!!!!
THE DAILY SHOWER IS EXPERIENCING TECHNICAL DIFFICULTIES.
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